When did it all get so messed up ? Would I give anything to sit with a true friend on a rooftop and cry my heart out ? YES.
I know right now I can write a really positive mail and that is what everyone needs to hear. Everyone recommends to stay away from indecisive and scared people and am scared I will be standing alone if people do that.
Because that’s me.
I have always thought quoting other people and copying lines from other blogs, will make my piece better because what I write is shit. So, that is what I have always done and when people appreciated it I never felt that happiness because I knew it was not I who wrote it. And the one time I wrote something myself and people appreciated, I never understood what people were liking about it because what i wrote was shit as usual.
Little did I realize that this was what I was doing with respect to every feeling, every decision.
I really love eating but leave me with a new person and ask me what I want to eat. I will say nothing because I am not good at deciding what to eat and I don’t want to keep the other person waiting. You know why I am never able to decide what to eat ? Because what if the other person does not like what I chose for myself ? What if getting it involves a bit extra trouble ?
So here I am, writing from my heart. Every word every line is mine. Every feeling is mine. If you are able to find yourself in these lines, don’t be afraid. You will find yourself and be fine, maybe not today, but soon. Because we have handled worse, and we can handle this. Let’s take a baby step. We have never made anyone work hard on the attention we give them, but let’s work a bit on the attention we give ourselves.